Monday, January 31, 2011

she was a small child, stunted from how much her mother
didn't give a fuck.
and the commercials told her
"you can be whatever you want when you grow up"

"what if i don't want to be anything?"
she asked the empty room.

you're the only shape i'll pray to



i always dreamed of sinking

now i dream of exploding
a million little pieces of you
where i used to be

lets play the game where you hide
and i find you in every corner of my soul.
it's me,
me that you are for.

she begs me to stay
well i will

Saturday, January 29, 2011

snowflake
catching you on my tongue and in the fibers of my clothes

Friday, January 28, 2011



i touch the place where wings

might
be,
if you were a bird
i could be a bird too, you know.


Thursday, January 27, 2011

i'm that 6 hour
2 layover with weather delay
red-eye flight

you get home and call me on the phone
"come over and don't bring any
clothes"

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

i think i have too much soul for this world
or not enough

i don't know.

[with you i don't have to think about thinking]

Monday, January 24, 2011

"marry me. i never want to see that sad
look on your face ever again."

this is the sidewalk where i met my heart.



the buildings closed in on either side and i felt like i was inside
new york city's veins
she came around the corner with a smile bigger than times square


[hundreds of days later i
kiss her because she's still sleeping, whisper to her eye lashes
"i do need you, you know."]

Sunday, January 23, 2011




patrick ran away, he said
"i'm going to california to grow oranges"

we were all very worried.

ghosting



i open the window and let the snowflakes
bite at skin with closed eyes darting under eyelids
tell me i'm living my life wrong.


[she told me a story about a rabbit that was running so fast from the dogs it
broke a leg and had to lay waiting-;
little chest heaving with fear.
her father and brothers (all good men, of course) snapped its neck and
they all ate rabbit for dinner.
"so am i the rabbit?"
"yes."
"and the dogs?"

"look in the mirror."


Saturday, January 22, 2011



he counted the stairs to make sure the number hadn't
changed
because sometimes little things tried to trick him; someone had tapped the
phone (clearly). they listened in on everything, looking for a confession-;
he picked the receiver up and made it easy for them.


Thursday, January 20, 2011

the accident took all her memories
one by one, a leaking faucet.




and after awhile she didn't get scared when she saw the tree
or the flayed bark
just a slow permanent smile
which is for the best, right?




i've been on vacation, doing a lot of this.

it's kind of nice when your hand
fits into someone else's
without being told to

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

.

i've got these wide thirsty eyes
you barely glance at buildings and lights and i think
"she's used to this."

i ache and roll over and throw the blankets from our bed
wide thirsty eyes
i miss home.

.

note:

my life is great i am
content, comfortable, safe. i am okay just having a little trouble finding the words
that i need to, call it writers block.

i will be back in a week, thanks for your patience

Tuesday, January 4, 2011



hook me under the sternum and
drag me through these days


i don't think i believe in the future.